Neverland University
Posted: January 6, 2014 Filed under: Culture, Humor, Satire | Tags: college, comedy, culture, education, humor, literature, Peter Pan, satire 2 CommentsAre you interested in making more money? Do you want a career, not just a job? Are you interested in finding a school that will provide you with a quality education at an affordable price? If so, consider Neverland University!
Our sprawling campus offers a diverse set of experiences for anyone, regardless of your field of study. Whether your interest is botany, culinary arts, or even military history there’s something for you here. We pride ourselves on maintaining an open and friendly atmosphere where none of our students is left to feel like an orphan.
For those who are interested in extracurricular activities, we have a wide range of options to choose from. The Lambda Betas are the most popular fraternity on campus, but there are plenty of other activities too. We maintain a Navy ROTC program, and from swimming to camping, there are all kinds of outdoor fun to be had. We’ve also recently changed our school mascot from the politically insensitive Indian to the environmentally conscious Crocodile. That hasn’t stopped us from maintaining a friendly rivalry with our neighboring school, the Buccaneers!
So if you’re serious about graduating from college while you’re still young enough to take advantage of your degree, just send your application to the second star to the right and straight on ‘til morning.
Famous Literature as Haiku
Posted: August 24, 2012 Filed under: Culture, Humor | Tags: comedy, culture, haiku, humor, literature, poetry, pop culture, popular culture 2 CommentsThe Illiad, by Homer
Damn, Helen is fine.
Whoops, started a big ass war.
Look, a giant horse.
The Odyssey, by Homer
Finished fighting war.
Got held up on the ride home.
House guests are a bitch.
The Inferno, by Dante Alighieri
Virgil leads the way,
Beatrice sent to guide me.
Can’t wait for next two.
Doctor Faustus, by Christopher Marlow
Summon a devil
I learn magic, lose my soul
Didn’t think that through
Hamlet, by William Shakespeare
Dad killed by uncle
A show to unveil the truth
Caught in the mousetrap
The Cthulhu Mythos, by H.P. Lovecraft
Inherit old books.
Nightmares full of tentacles.
Hastur Hastur Hast-
Death of a Salesman, by Arthur Miller
Meet Willy Loman.
He’s liked, but he’s not well liked.
This will not end well.
Waiting for Godot, by Samuel Beckett
Nothing must be done.
Wait is interminable.
End of line: no show.
Finnegan’s Wake, by James Joyce
Book rich with meaning.
Complex, deep, yet still has puns.
Bitter old author.
Atlas Shrugged, by Ayn Rand
Too many moochers.
Let the country fall apart.
Get a job, hippie.
